testing, testing...

more tests. i'm ready for more, if you are. bring it! consider it brought!

i feel like everything seems to be a huge test lately. either i'm feeling testy because someone or something is getting on my nerves or it really is a test that js and i have to work through.

pbs likes to push buttons. he likes to say, "i'm pushing your buttons!", when he's pushing buttons on a remote or an old cell phone. it's pretty cute but sometimes it's true, he is pushing my buttons. i try to laugh it off and go on with whatever i'm trying to accomplish. sometimes i get angry and frustrated and that shows on my face, in my actions. pbs can tell and seems to get a little bit scared. i try to take a step back and look at the situation and approach it a different way. it doesn't always work.

i think he's testing js and me to see how far he can push us before we tell him to stop. i'll tell him up to three times not to do something. if by the third time he hasn't changed his behavior i take action. we sit him on a step for a time-out or if he's doing something that is dangerous, he gets a spanking. i hate spanking him. it tears me apart to have to do it. i guess it's another test that i have to work through.

we've gotten some results back from some of our blood tests and they were all normal. we're still waiting on some others. the waiting seems like a test sometimes too. how patiently i can wait is the hardest test right now, i think. i guess we'll have more testing done if the other tests come back normal too.

testing, testing...